Boobkies (or heart shaped sugar cookies)

So. I am not a professional baker, nor a mad scientist, nor patient, nor sane, nor sober.

All of these things that I am not means that I will most always usually use some sort of chopped and screwed recipe from the internets or cookbooks, for my all of my baking endeavours.

So. If you’d like the recipe for these very delicious looking and tasting birthday multicultural boobkies, here it is:

Recipe for success:

1. Googley: “joy of baking- chocolate sugar cookies”.
2. Double the recipe without adding the cocoa.
3. Make the doubled amount (sans cocoa), according to the recipe of the Joy of Baking scientists-of-enduring-patience-and-sobriety.
4. IMPORTANT: split the dough in half, and then, to one half of the dough, add only half-ish of the cocoa powder the recipe asks you to. Slowly add more if it seems like your dough isn’t getting too dry. It is likely that naively trusting your recipe and adding it all will result in a dry cookie fail, as experienced by me.
5. Also make the icing as per the doubled recipe.
6. Tint some of the icing pink using gel colouring, or powder. The liquid ones are bad new bears for royal icing.
7. Tint some of the icing brownish pink for extra multicultaralism.
8. Leave some icing white for extra vulgarity, as executed by me.
9. Bake cookies according to recipe. Cool. Do not resist the urge to eat several. Despite planning for nipples on your cookies, you are an adult and are allowed to do what you want.*
10. Invert cookies to appropriate boob orientation, and decorate as desired.

Love and treasure your boob-cookies. They represent everything that is good and pure about adulthood.


*There is a small chance that you might not be an adult, and yet have clicked on the picture of the cookie boobs. Kindly ask your mother if you’re allowed to know what boobs, and additionally, nipples are. If she says yes, you are likely allowed to eat cookies that are being cooled. If she says no, but you can read and understand this post, as well as perform the recipe for success, you are some sort of child genius and deserve freshly baked cookies.