Afternoon Tea+ At Ruelo Patisserie

Garbed in ‘I Shoot Like A Girl’ t-shirts and only slightly potted one recent Sunday afternoon in July, Squid and I headed over to a relatively new instalment in the Yonge & Eg hood: Ruelo Patisserie.

The news of a casual afternoon tea for 15 bucks per person was too tantalizing to pass up and I had previously tried Ruelo’s croisants to my delight. In the words of the venerable Danny Bhoy, they were ‘flaky and a little bit gay.’ Everything you’d expect from a good croisant. So, we figured that was justification enough to roll a little higher.

We ordered tea for two and the bill came to somewhere in the province of 35 bucks after tax. Not bad for the whole hoity-toity kitten caboodle of an afternoon tea affair.

THE MENU: We received a pot of tea each steeped from any choice of Kusmi Teas from France, of which we tried some of the Russian ilk. With our tea came a selection of bruschetta, crostinis, and whatever the crap you call veggies wrapped in prosciutto/jamón serrano; an assortment of scones armed with Devon cream and jelly; two cheese pastries, and one macaroon each, in the flavour of our choosing. We chose raspberry leechee and I feel compelled to tell you that they were f*cking yum. I’ve never understood the fuss about macarons (and YES, I have eaten them in Paris, France), until now!

We enjoyed the affair so much that I returned several days later to sample more macarons and to put the girls at Ruelo’s cappuccino making skills to test. They passed with flying colours. But, and it’s a big BUTT, if you think what StarF‡ck’s gives you when you ask for a cappuccino is in fact a cappuccino and you allow yourself to believe that it is passable as coffee, do not go to Ruelo. In fact, put a sharpened pencil pointed end first in each of your nostrils and slam your face into the counter/tabel/desk as hard as you can. F¿cker! You are what is wrong with the world.

Finally, since Ruelo is situated en route to Eglinton Station, the trade tends to come in the morning in the form of in-out foot traffic. Expect to have the place to yourself and revel in quiet escapism, loudly and with merriment.

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Ruelo Patisserie
Yonge & Eglinton Location
4-6 Erskine Ave.
Toronto, ON M4P 1Y2
p. 416.486.1800
e. info@ruelo.com

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